Friends With Benefits

I was very pleasantly surprised with the hilarity of this movie. Having already seen No String Attached, I expected this to be the same thing but with better acting (I would choose Justin Timberlake over Ashton Kutcher for anything), but it was so much better than that.

Starting with the beginning, with surprise appearances from Andy Samberg (whom I love) and Emma Stone (with whom I was very pleasantly surprised), I was laughing more than I have at a movie I have seen in theatres in a very, very long time. The whole movie ended up exceeding my expectations, from the acting to the storyline and even to the music choices. I am and have always been a Justin Timberlake fan (ever since his N'SYNC days!) so I had high hopes for him, that he undoubtedly lived up to. I usually find Mila Kunis annoying and too girly, but she showed a different side of her that was more real and easier for me to relate to.

As for the story, I was never squirming out of discomfort at the cheesy lines or awkward cliches. I laughed at every single one of the jokes, which was basically every time Justin opened his mouth. I even almost shed a tear (which means nothing, really, since I cry at almost anything) at the reality of Justin's character's father's Alzheimer's (which might also be because they played I Will Follow You Into the Dark, which is one of my all time favorite songs because it's so beautiful, and fit beautifully into the scene.)

Basically, to be cliche, I laughed, I cried, and I walked out of the theatre wishing I could sit down and watch it again right that second. I haven't been this impressed with a recent movie in a very long time!
p.s. Justin Timberlake is so sexy, I can't even handle it... (i apologize...)

Summer

It is already August and I haven't written a word on this blog all summer! I am so embarrassed at the amount of time I spend scrolling through pictures and posts on Tumblr, causing me to neglect my blog! I miss writing, I miss reading other blogs, and I miss being able to look back at all of my old posts! (I can still do that, of course, but a year or so from now, I'll find that I had basically fallen off the face of the earth for the past year due to my extreme lack of posting.)
As I've been brainstorming about my college essay, I've discovered that my creative writing juices have been clogged by an increased intake in pictures. As much as I love to look at pretty pictures, and as inspiring as they can be, it seems I've gotten into a lazy funk, scrolling through pictures rather than words because it's just, simply, easier.
I've decided, though, to vow to write more. I love staying up late on a random night, letting my fingers graze the keyboard, spilling out stupid stories and underdeveloped characters. I can spend hours scrolling through pictures that I will never remember, pressing one simple button to put them on my blog, and as convenient that is, I feel as if I am becoming increasingly lazy, finding it easier to reblog someone else's post rather than post something myself. I've started to find my own pictures from Flickr pages I've discovered myself, but even that has become somewhat routine.
In short, I've found myself in simple routine that, from the outside, seems creative and educational, due to the photographers, websites, and cultures I have learned about through constantly reblogging, but it is time I spend less time being inspired from hundreds of other people, and start inspiring myself. Of course, I might never stop using tumblr, because the website makes it so easy to learn about things that I find most interesting, but I need to devote more time to my own blog, where I can search for myself, and write, and ponder, and comment on life rather than just look at it for a second or two and never really go beyond the surface.
This is the last year that I will be living in my house, seeing all of my friends every single day, knowing every single person in my class and my school, and have comfort in knowing that people know who I am. I need to start reaching out and relying more on myself rather than other people and things, because I'm leaving for college soon and I have no other choice but to grow up.

Transformation

"Do you remember when we were friends with her?"
Yes I do remember, actually. I do remember when I was friends with her. I remember when I met her on the morning bus on the first day of school. I remember when I introduced myself to her and her sister, and we sat together for the rest of the year. I remember when we discovered that we had the same lunch period, and I invited her to sit with us, ignoring the objection from you and the others. I remember when we walked over to the table and I told her she could sit with us even though everyone else publicly objected. I remember when I sat down with her and everyone got up and left. I remember being alienated from my lunch table because I wanted her to sit with us. I could see the judgment in your eyes. She dresses differently. She obviously doesn't have as much money as us. She's not as good as us. I remember going to her house to get ready for the Christmas dance: doing our hair and makeup, and eating dinner with her parents. I remember having fun with her. I also remember growing apart. I remember myself avoiding her, slowly, throughout the year and the next one because I was self conscious. Regrets.
But, yes, I remember when I was friends with her. I don't remember when you were, though, sorry.
It's sad to say that although your tendencies are shown less, you have not changed at all.

Prompt

Oliver walked briskly through the crowd, until he reached the sidewalk. Once out of the chaos, he was able to catch his breath and slow his pace. He adjusted the straps of his backpack and patted his pockets, obsessively making sure his wallet was still in its place. Ever since he lost his last wallet last week, which contained his food money and ID cards, he had been extra careful about keeping this one in his sight at all times.

As he turned the corner and moved further and further away from the crowd, his pace became slower and slower, and his posture became more relaxed. He walked until the sky turned from a bright blue to a light purple. When he reached the view of the lake, he stopped moving for a moment, took in a large breath of fresh air, and walked around to sit on a park bench facing the picturesque scenery. He pulled his backpack around onto his lap, pulled out his iPod, and set music to the landscape, watching as the waves and the trees seemed to dance to his music.

Natalie ran through the park, laughing loudly. Her hair was flying behind her, pushed back by the wind. She looked back towards the forest and noticed that no one was following her, but she could hear their laughter. She looked around quickly and saw a park bench facing the lake. She turned around again quickly just in time to see her friends coming out of the woods. She quickly turned around and jetted behind the park bench, looking for safety. She didn’t notice until then that the bench was occupied. The boy there looked startled as her briskness and laughter awoke him.

He shot her a confused look as she crouched by his legs. She put her finger to her lips, hoping to keep him quiet. He looked at her again and turned around just as three other girls sprinted by the bench, laughing. As they passed the bench, the girl let out a huge sigh and sat on the bench next to the boy.

“Thanks,” she said, gratefully.

He didn’t reply. He was too tired and lax to process what was occurring. Natalie stood up and sat on the bench next to the boy. He hadn’t put back in his headphones, and she wasn’t sure if he was going to talk to her or not. For what felt like an eternity, she sat on the opposite side of the bench, looking across to the lake.

Oliver sat in silence for a moment, formulating words in his head.

“So, uh, what were you doing?” he asked the girl after a few seconds.

She laughed at him without taking her eyes off of the scenery in front of her. “I’m a member of this group where we play extreme games. They’re basically just games we all played when we were kids, but we play without boundaries. This week it has been extreme tag!”

He honestly didn’t know how to reply. He had never heard of anything so ridiculous, but spontaneous in his life. “That sounds… interesting.”

“Oh, it is! One week we did extreme hide-and-seek, and I think my favorite so far has been extreme Ping-Pong.”

He could help but chuckle. “Extreme Ping-Pong?”

She laughed with him. “It’s great! It just like regular Ping-Pong except you’re allowed to hit it off the floor and walls and stuff. It’s actually quite a work out!”

Oliver just laughed. When he looked over at her, she was still looking ahead at the lake, giggling to herself.

“I’m Oliver, by the way,” he said.

She turned her head and her eyes met his. “Hello Oliver, I’m Natalie.” She stuck out her hand, and he took it in his, shaking it.

I don't know if this is finished. Or if I will ever finish it. But it was inspired by this, so here you go :)

p.s. I copied this from a Word document and it won't let me fix the formatting so it doesn't look very attractive...

PROM PROM PROM

Okay, so I OFFICIALLY have everything set for the one day of my teenage life where I can have almost everything EXACTLY the way I want it. Do I sound conceited? Yes. Do I care at this point? No. Because I'm about to have the best night ever :)
Anyway, rather than expressing my extreme excitement (which I can't even put into words, hence the poor explanation) I will dedicate this post to my SHOES.
Now, I am not usually a "shoe" girl (I have three pairs of shoes I wear every single day, and two of them are sneakers). At first, I wanted to go with a simple, nude pump to tone down my cobalt blue dress. I searched at TJ Maxx finding heels too high or sizes too big, before I came across what I thought were the perfect shoes at none other than my favorite store of all time: Target. I bought them for about 20 bucks, and they looked so perfect with my dress.
The second I put them on, though, my mom started telling me I needed to add "bling" to them to dress them up a bit. I kept telling her that my dress was so bright, I needed the shoes to tone them down a bit, but she eventually convinced me that I needed to add more to them.
After searching for inspiration here, I set out on an adventure to Joann's to search for ribbon and other pretty things. As I walked down the aisles, I came across a shelf with "headband accessories." My sight immediately went to the stack of peacock feathers. I showed them to my dad, laughing, remembering the twenties headband I tried on at the dress shop. I walked around aimlessly, leaving the feathers behind, searching for goodies. After a while, with nothing in my hand but blue ribbon, I came back to the feathers. I started to look closer at them and think of ideas. My dad and I agreed that the little blue in the feathers would match my dress perfectly, and after a quick call to my mom for advice, I was on my way home with two peacock feathered "headband accessories."
After some trial and error, I attached the accessory to my shoes and I fell in love.

Before:

AFTER!




p.s. sorry for the awkward/poor quality photos. my camera is broken so I have to use photobooth... haha

Why must you act that way? Like the world revolves around you, like everything I say is wrong, like it is my mission in life to make you miserable. The world does not revolve around you. In case you don't remember anything from earth science, the world revolves around the sun. Last time I checked you are not the sun. The world will not revolve around you. People will not change their plans to fit around your needs. This night is not all about you. It is about us. It is about our entire class, about our friends, and the people we care about. Why don't you want to capture memories with all of our friends? Why must you complain about me to my best friend? Why is it such a big deal that I want to get as much done as possible?
I am sick of you. I am done dealing with you. I am sick of you complaining when others make a suggestion. I am sick of you blaming other people for something they didn't do. I'm sick of you expecting people to give you the work they worked hard on so that you can copy it. I'm sick of you thinking that you are the sun. You are not the sun; you are not even a star. You are an asteroid, creating craters in relationships and contentedness.

Friends Forever

Today in church, I sat behind two little old women who reminded me vaguely of you and me. They looked extremely elegant in their pea coats and light white hair. Their makeup was done perfectly, colorfully complementing their skin. They whispered to each other at appropriate times during mass and quietly giggled to each other. They acted like they had been friends forever; like sisters that looked nothing alike, except for their mutual smiles and the twinkle in their eyes. They laughed at the same things, and seemed to be able to read each other's minds. When they turned around and I wished them peace, I looked at them, quietly thinking of you, hoping that that would be us in 70 years. I hope that we still know each other in 70 years as we do now. I hope that we can still laugh and go to church together and be as close we were sophomore year.
Seeing them made me miss you. I miss talking to you everyday and going to church with you after volleyball. I miss us being able to read each other's minds. I miss talking to you about anything and everything and going to your house for a sleepover or downtown to eat crepes. I miss you.
I want us to be the little old ladies who go to church together with smiles on our faces and twinkles in our eyes.

I hate high school. I hate bratty, selfish, spoiled, immature people. I hate having to ride the bus home everyday and having to deal with stupid little 7th and 8th graders. I hate that I'm letting it bug me this much. I hate all the stuff I have to do and that I'm overwhelmed so I can't get anything done. I hate that my mom won't let me drive even though I've had my license for almost 2 months. I hate being so angry. I hate that I can't enjoy anything anymore. I hate being the friend that everyone forgets about. The one that is always left alone. I hate being a pessimist and hating everything. I hate SATs and SAT prep. I hate AP classes. I hate how my entire future relies on how successful I am in the next three months and how I haven't been doing my best because I'm so busy. I hate dealing with obnoxious people. I hate dealing with immature people. I hate dealing with everyone. I hate when people don't understand, and then I hate myself for expecting them to understand. I hate expecting so much from people. I hate not being inspired or even motivated to do anything. I hate how nothing works when I want it to. Ever. I hate that a girl in my school is pregnant, and a girl at my mom's school is pregnant and my aunt lost her babies.

I hate that I'm so sad all the time.

I hope you thought about what I said. I hope what I said meant something to you. I respect your decision and your motivation, but I don't want your presumed failure to motivate you. You will not fail; you cannot fail, and that I promise. To quote the cliche, you will never know until you try. Just try. Apply. Just do it. Listen to what I told you. You are not stupid. You are not a failure. You can make it. If they can, you can. You have something in you that sets you apart from the rest. You just have to find it. Please, just think about it, before you regret not taking the risk to prove it to yourself.

Inspiration

vanessa jackman

NEW LAPTOP!

Hello!
I FINALLY bought a NEW laptop that actually has WiFi and actually loads faster than a turtle and clicks where and when I want it to. I haven't been the best blogger lately because I have been going through the hell that is midterm week, but the week is over, and I have lots to share. So, now that I have better access to the internet and far more time, I will be able to write a lot more often!
So, some topics that you should expect to hear about it the near future:

- PROM!
- Glamour Gals
- School/College venting
- Jewelry parties
- SKINS! (and Greek)
etc, etc, in addition to many random posts to help me through my day.

Here is a loverly photo of moi from photobooth on my brand spankin' new MAC!
loveeeee,
H :)

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini

Before watching an old movie over the summer, I saw a preview for this book-turned-movie. I remember my mother and grandmother reading it and found it sitting on the bookshelf at my camp. I asked for my grandmother's permission and borrowed it from our camp, bringing it home and leaving it sitting on a table in my room for a few months. After a few months passed and I finished reading the current book for English class, I was looking for a good book and re-stumbled upon this. I picked it up and immediately couldn't put it down. I found myself taking this book out of my backpack during the school day, and staying up later than I should have, not being able to pull myself away. The setting immediately intrigued me, as I am one to search for knowledge of other cultures. What I did not expect, though, was how much I could relate to the characters. Although the tragedy of the story is more horrific than anything I could ever live through, the feelings of guilt, sorrow, and Amir's ability to eventually absolve his heavy self-inflicted burdens reminded me of my past and inspired me for my future.
I immediately became attached to every single one of the characters. Most books I have read have an easily lovable character and an easily hateable one, though as I learned about the regretful pasts of many of the characters, I could not help but to love them even more.
The growth and actions of the characters really made me think about my own life and how I've been living. I don't want to give away the ending, so I will keep it vague, but it truly inspired me. The way Amir acted at the end of the story, though he lived his whole life with the guilt of many important parts of his and his father's life, he acted with courage and ultimate strength.
When I make decisions now, and sometimes even randomly during the day, I think of this book and of Amir, Hassan, and Baba. It makes me think of how much your decisions can affect another person's entire life and how much courage counts. Courage, strength, and redemption: three very important things in life that this book taught me to always think about. Courage, for being able to strive for what you want; strength, to be able to persevere; and redemption, knowing that as long as you have the courage and strength to strive and persevere, you will be forgiven, in some way, shape, or form.